How do you write a travel blog when you can’t travel?

When I wrote about occasional blogging back in May 2019 (The pros and cons of being an occasional blogger), and commented on how long it was since I’d last blogged (a month or two), I really had no idea what constituted ‘long’ – try over a year! I can’t even blame COVID entirely, as my last post was in December 2019, three months before lockdown hit and my travel plans were disrupted. I remember thinking about blogging at the beginning of lockdown – how maybe I’d have a bit more time to devote to it, given that I’d spent the last few months working and not blogging. Of course, that was a little short-sighted – why exactly did I think I’d have more time?! Sure, if I was furloughed it would have been a different case. But as I work from home anyway, things didn’t really change in that respect. Work continued as normal, daily chores still needed doing. Sure I’ve spent some of the last year not needing to do the school run or take the kids to their various activities, and my social life has taken a definite dive. But that has been replaced with the kids spending much of the past year at home, meaning time spent helping them with homeschooling – plus extra tidying. I’ve also upped my exercise in the hope of making up for being stuck at home and in an attempt to counteract the effects of my daily Tunnocks Teacakes (yes, that was a deliberate plural). So, all in all, I’ve had no extra time – possibly less than before, in fact.

Of course, time isn’t the only – or even the main – reason why I haven’t blogged for over a year. It’s pretty hard to write a holiday blog when you can’t go on holiday! Who wants to read me wittering on about all the holidays I’d like to go on but can’t?! The frequency of my Twitter and Instagram posts has also much reduced too, as I have very little new to say or post. It’s not like I haven’t still got old holidays I could blog about, mind you – I think only one of five holidays in 2019 actually made it onto the blog after all, so it’s not like I haven’t got the ‘material’. But I’ve also lost enthusiasm – rehashing old holidays is no fun when you have no idea when you’ll be able to go on another one. I’m also not convinced that people would want to read a holiday blog right now either. I know I don’t much enjoy vicarious travel unless I can use it as inspiration for planning future trips. Writing about holidays feels a bit like rubbing people’s noses in it, even if I’m not going on any either.

Corfu, 2019 – one of several holidays that haven’t yet made it to a blog post!

This got me thinking about ‘proper’ travel bloggers – those who earn a living (or at least part of one) from blogging about travel. The past year must have been really difficult for them, when their ability to travel has been either greatly reduced or stopped altogether, depending on where they’re based and what risks they’re willing to take. It’s not even like restaurants or days out have been available for a large chunk of the past year! I doubt that hotels or tour companies will have been keen on sponsorship, as they’re likely to have had to cut costs. And I suspect that readership will also have reduced – travel blogs will get much of their traffic from people planning trips, and not many people are doing that right now. The travel industry has been hit very hard by the pandemic, and the travel blog community will have been one of many casualties. It’s certainly made me feel very lucky to have a regular income and a job that hasn’t been affected by the virus, and relieved that holiday blogging has only ever been an occasional hobby for me.

But of course one of my main hobbies is actually going on holiday – and that hobby has taken a major hit. Early 2020 saw the postponement of a trip to Center Parcs in the Netherlands at Easter, although we held on desperately, hoping that things would magically get better. They didn’t, of course, and it’s now looking likely that this Easter’s rebooked Center Parcs trip will have to be postponed yet again. We held out hope for our camping trip in Dorset for May half-term – after all, no planes, ferries or other public transport, no hotel room, no shared inside area – just us in our own tent, cooking our own food and keeping to ourselves. Of course, we were still in lockdown by the time half-term came, and that was another holiday postponed until 2021. We started thinking about our October holiday in Mexico. Surely everything would be okay by then?! But what if we were still having to take precautions? What if we had to wear masks for the whole 12-hour flight? What if the hotel buffets were closed? What if we had to wear masks on the beach? What if not all the promised activities were offered? What if attractions like Chichen Itza were closed or you had to wear masks? (The obsession with masks comes from being an asthmatic who struggles in humidity – breathing while wearing a mask in hot weather is hard enough, without attempting to move at the same time.) We decided that the safest thing would be to postpone Mexico until October 2021. Even if we were ‘allowed’ to go, we didn’t want to pay all that money and go all that way for a ‘once in a lifetime’ trip where we couldn’t do and see everything that we wanted to, and which would be ‘once in a lifetime’ for all the wrong reasons. [Sidenote: A hurricane actually hit the resort in October 2020, so we were kind of glad we’d postponed!] We weren’t sure what to do about Corfu in August though. Would we be able to go? Would it be safe to go? Would we want to go? And if we didn’t, would we get our money back? By August, things were a little up in the air. We were allowed to travel abroad but the situation was constantly changing. There was a strong possibility that we’d need to isolate for two weeks on return, which would have been impossible as the kids were due back at school. We were concerned about what would happen if we caught COVID while on holiday. We didn’t feel very confident about the idea of being confined on a plane with other people who may have the virus. And, actually, our apartment complex had decided not to even open, which made our decision a little easier! Our holiday company eventually officially cancelled and refunded us, and bang went our final scheduled holiday for 2020. We had thought earlier in the year about booking something for the Christmas markets, as we felt sure that it would all be over by then. Thank goodness we didn’t!

*Portsmouth, February 2020 – the last holiday before lockdown!*

Suffice to say that 2020 was a pretty disappointing year! Of course, cancelled holidays was the least of our worries in the big scheme of things, and was trivial compared to what 2020 brought to many people. As a self-confessed holiday obsessive, cancelling holidays was upsetting, as was not being able to do so many of the other things I love, like going out to eat, catching up with friends and pub quizzes in an actual pub. Still, I kept reminding myself, it could be worse. I could have COVID. I could have lost someone to COVID. I could have lost my job or my business, be furloughed or facing an otherwise uncertain work or financial future. I could have been in a job where I had to go out to work every day and put myself and my family at risk. I could have been one of those NHS workers on the frontline, caring for people with COVID, watching them die without their loved ones, putting in stupid hours without adequate PPE and coming home exhausted, all the while knowing that my own risk of catching the virus is high. That said, I’ve never been a fan of the whole ‘it could be worse’ comparison scenario when trying to feel better about something. After all, knowing that you could have two broken legs and a fractured wrist doesn’t make the pain of one broken leg any better. And knowing that things could be worse doesn’t necessarily reduce the disappointment or misery of putting your life on hold; in fact, it probably makes it worse, as then you’re adding guilt into the mix, feeling like you have no right to be disappointed by a cancelled holiday or sad not to have seen your best friend for a few months when there are people out there literally putting their lives on the line. But I think it’s important to allow ourselves to feel sadness and disappointment, even about the little things. Most people have found the last year difficult for a whole host of reasons – that’s only to be expected, and pretending that everything’s fine or feeling guilty about down days only opens the door to mental health issues. BUT I do think it’s really important at times like these to also be grateful for what you do have and make the most of the opportunities that you have got.

I’m grateful to be working from home already and that my husband is able to work from home. I’m grateful to be financially secure and not have been impacted too much by COVID. I’m grateful that our house is big enough that we all have our own space to work and that we have enough tech for the kids to be able to do school work at the same time as my husband and I are working. I’m grateful that my kids are old enough to be able to ‘school’ themselves while we get on with work. I’m grateful that we have a garden, giving us an extra room in the summer months and providing somewhere to sit and enjoy the warmer weather. I’m grateful to live in a lovely village with the countryside on our doorstep, with abundant opportunities for beautiful walks plus plenty of local facilities. I’m grateful that I’m not only physically able to walk but that I actually like walking, as does my husband – I may be restricted but at least one of my favourite things is still doable. I’m grateful to be able to keep in touch with friends and family via social media and Zoom, if not in person. I’m grateful to have stayed physically healthy and about as mentally healthy as it’s possible to be in these confusing and worrying times, and grateful that my kids are generally coping well. When I’m feeling down or anxious (and, I confess, that’s pretty regularly), I think really hard about these things. Compared to so many people I am REALLY lucky, and I think that’s an important reality check right now.

I’m also really grateful to have managed to go on not one but THREE holidays in 2020 (and that’s not including a mini-break in February before everything stopped). Of course, none of those holidays were the ones we had originally planned. None of them were abroad. They were all self-catering, as we didn’t feel comfortable staying in a hotel. And we were fairly restricted with what we did, partly down to COVID rules and partly down to our own levels of comfort and safety. Our activities were almost exclusively outside (not that easy, as we had some shocking weather) – mostly walking, and certainly no swimming, cinema, bowling or the other things we might normally do on holiday. We mostly cooked, with the occasional take-away, and lunches were generally eaten in the garden of cafes and restaurants, as we didn’t feel safe spending large amounts of time inside. The holidays weren’t as relaxing as they normally would be, for obvious reasons, nor as warm and dry as if we’d made it to Corfu or Mexico. But my goodness, it was wonderful just to see some different sights. To sleep in a different bed. To spend evenings on a different sofa. To go for walks somewhere we’d never been. And, of course, to take some time away from work and day-to-day chores, which is extra difficult when you’re all working at home. They may not have been the holidays we’d had planned, but I’m so grateful that we did manage to get away and very aware that many people weren’t that lucky.

We’ve also done our best to make the best of the opportunities we have had, especially the beautiful weather at the beginning of the first lockdown. You can probably guess that we went – and still go – for lots of walks: short walks, long walks, lunchtime walks, walks after work, daytime walks with a picnic… We’ve walked every footpath in our local area and found places we didn’t know about. We’ve watched the seasons changing and seen woods full of bluebells and fields of poppies. We’ve seen newborn lambs, butterflies, squirrels and birds. We’ve really tried to take notice of what’s around us, things we usually take for granted. We’ve walked further afield, in woods, on cliffs, up hills, along rivers and around towns. We’ve also done other ‘outdoor’ day trips – beaches, picnics, castles, crazy golf and so on. We’ve explored our local cafes and eaten in their gardens. We’ve met up with friends and family outside, keeping our distance. Basically, we’ve refused to stay at home when there has been a safe option to get out. Sure, the weather has scuppered our plans on a few occasions, and it’s proving a lot harder in a winter lockdown, but we’ve done our best to ‘make memories’, to use a cliché.

So, to go back to my title question, my personal answer for the past year has clearly been ‘you don’t’. But those ‘proper’ travel bloggers I mentioned earlier have done – they’ve had to! So what have they done? They’ve written about old adventures and previous holidays. They’ve gone on walks and day trips and written about those. They’ve taken ‘staycations’ when they were allowed to and got as much materials as possible from them. Some have taken advantage of the lower virus numbers over the summer and gone on some of those trips abroad that they had planned – or perhaps different ones. They’ve written opinion posts or blogs giving general travel advice. They’ve written about travel in a pandemic. They’ve updated old blog posts. They’ve taken advantage of what’s around them more locally. They may have adapted their blogs to include non-travel-related subjects. They’ve possibly posted less than they would normally and maybe, like me, some of them kind of lost their mojo. I’d guess it must be even harder to blog about travel you can’t do when you know that the blog really counts. But travel blogs are still out there and still going strong – and with the vaccine currently being rolled out across the world and our hopes for travelling again becoming a little more concrete (Boris said recently that he is ‘optimistic’ about summer holiday prospects!), it’s likely that our appetite for travel blogs will start to grow again. We’ll be thinking about where we might be able to go this summer. Which countries will let us in? Where could we go in the UK if going abroad is not an option? Where could we go at Christmas? I’m trying to be optimistic that some of our rebooked holidays will be going ahead this year, and if they can’t then I’ll be busy planning exactly what we can do. And so, with a tiny but growing hope for holidays and a lull in work, I’m starting to get my blogging mojo back. I have three UK destinations from last year that could make it into future blog posts. I have hosts of old holidays from which I can dredge up destination guides, advice and disaster stories – hopefully without feeling sad about the holidays I’ve missed. 2021 will be my year of holidays – and if not, 2022 will be. I’ll get there eventually. But maybe, at least, 2021 will be my year of holiday blogging.

Maybe I’ll finally get to scratch off Mexico this year…

Country counting and the scratch map

Why are so many people obsessed with counting the number of countries they’ve visited? I don’t know the answer but I confess I’m one of them. And despite what many of my friends think (due to how often we go on holiday!), it’s not actually that many in my case – at least not compared to most in the travel blog community. One of the reasons I’ve not visited more countries is that we keep repeating ourselves – with countries at least, if not with actual destinations (although we do repeat specific destinations too). There are many reasons for this, with money and convenience being at the top of the list. Sure, I’d love to go to New Zealand one year, Canada the next, China the next and so on. But, of course, these are expensive destinations, mainly due to the sheer distance needed for travel. France, on the other hand, is just an hour or so away – we live quite near Dover, we’ve won ferry tickets many times and it’s a very cheap and easy place to visit. It’s no surprise that we go back time and again! We also go back to places because we’ve enjoyed them – while I love seeing and exploring new locations, there’s also something very comforting in going back to a place where you’ve been before and where you know you’ll enjoy.

Despite this, I still feel a pull to count countries. A visit to St Peter’s while in Rome? Excellent, that’s Vatican City crossed off. A day trip to Monaco while staying in the South of France? Great, another country ticked. And surely England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland should count as four separate countries?! I’ve even got competitive with my husband. Given that we’ve been together over 25 years, most of our travelling has been done together, but he went to America as a child – I was so relieved when we went to Florida together, as it made us equal! Equal in number at least, as he’d been to Ireland and I hadn’t, but I’d been to Germany and he hadn’t. Needless to say, I felt weirdly reluctant when we decided to visit Germany as a family, and now feel the urge to go to Ireland just for the sake of evening things up! I even do the same with continents – thank goodness for that cruise to Egypt from Cyprus, as it allowed me to visit Africa! And despite trying to get away with an airport stop in Singapore counting as Asia (and Turkey – bit of a grey area, that one!), I was glad to officially cross off Asia when we went to Hong Kong. Still waiting for South America, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a slight urge to visit Antarctica just for the sake of it!

The Twitter travel community is full of posts on counting countries, and several recommended an app called ‘been’. I downloaded it, of course, and set about ticking off the countries that I’d visited. It turns out (according to ‘been’) that I’ve visited nine per cent of the world. Hmmm, doesn’t exactly sound impressive, given that I’m well over nine per cent of the way through my life! I’ve managed 33 per cent of Europe, which sounds better, but still doesn’t really get me too close to visiting all the countries of the world (or even of Europe!). I found that the app was useful in terms of keeping track of where I’ve been, but I wanted something more visual, and something that was more satisfying to change when I visited somewhere new (I’m a list girl, and love crossing things off). So I decided to buy a scratch map – you know, one of those maps where you scratch off the countries you’ve visited.

If I’m honest, I was rather disappointed when it arrived, as I realised there was a fundamental problem with it. Anyone who’s got one will know what I’m about to say – some of the countries are just too bloody small to even see, let alone scratch off! My scratched-off Cyprus is barely visible; there wasn’t even the opportunity to scratch off a separate Andorra, Vatican City or Monaco. It’s not as if the map is small – it’s nearly a metre wide – but it makes it clear just how few countries I’ve visited (and how small they are!) in relation to the world as a whole. One of the reasons I bought it was because we were planning a day trip to Albania from Corfu in the summer, and I was looking forward to the satisfaction of scratching it off. Well, there was nothing satisfying about scratching that off – I needed a pin rather than a coin to be precise enough. And now it’s done, you’d need a magnifying glass to be able to notice that anything’s changed!

The scratch map has, however, changed how I think about counting countries and adding to my number. Now I’m not thinking just about new countries but I’m also thinking about BIG countries. Brazil, Russia, Canada or China? Great idea. Lichtenstein or Slovenia? Nah, they won’t show. Antarctica is looking even more attractive. And when we booked a holiday to (reasonably sized) Mexico next October, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t looking forward to seeing what colour it is on the map!

Oh okay, there you go. Look out for that splash of pink near Italy’s heel!

The pros and cons of being an occasional blogger

As your average working Jo(ann)e rather than a full-time travel blogger, I have two main obstacles to keeping my blog updated regularly. The first is finding the time to blog on top of work, family and general life admin. The second is having something to blog about – although I go on holiday every opportunity I get, this is obviously limited to when I can take time away from work, when my husband can book time off, when my children have school holidays (assuming it’s a family holiday) and (of course) when (and where) I can afford to go. And although I could rattle on about politics, celebrities, the weather or life in general, I would prefer to keep this blog at least tenuously travel-related – so if I haven’t travelled anywhere, it leaves me a bit limited as to what to blog about!

Ironically, I’ve actually not long been on holiday, yet this post isn’t about that! It was supposed to be when I started writing it. We went on a family holiday to Center Parcs in the Netherlands over Easter, and I was poised to write about our time there. But then I noticed how long it’s been since I last blogged, and then I felt the need to explain why and then my brain kinda went off-track… And this is the problem when trying to fit in a job at the same time as maintaining a blog: blogging is always going to play second fiddle to work – and, usually, any other responsibilities you may have.

Of course, I’m by no means alone in this situation. Lots of bloggers – most, probably – have full- or part-time jobs and blog on the side, either to supplement their main income or, like me, as a hobby. Some are probably better at regulating their time than I am, and make sure they keep updating their blogs more regularly, but others will struggle, just like I do. I would guess that those who have children probably struggle most and single bloggers probably find it easiest to fit in the blogging, although this is of course a gross generalisation. Personally, I find that my family takes up most of the time I’m not working – and given the choice, I would generally rather spend time with my children and husband than blog, but it does mean that the blog suffers! On an average day, I work during school hours, and occasionally fit in some exercise if I want to live long enough to enjoy lots more holidays. Then it’s the school run, talk to the kids about their day, perhaps help with homework and probably take them to an after-school activity. Then it’s make and eat dinner, put the kids to bed, collapse on the sofa and catch up with my husband and a bit of TV. Weekends are generally spent with the family – perhaps swimming, cinema or a walk, or various other activities that always fall at the weekend: school fete, birthday party, sporting event, etc. Oh yes, and on top of that, there’s shopping, washing, cleaning and all those admin-type tasks that seem to take up so much time – plus, of course, catching up with friends and family and attempting some sort of social life. I’m sure this day sounds pretty familiar to most working parents, but for those trying to blog in addition, you’ll know how difficult it is to fit it in!

However, unlike many working bloggers, I work from home on a freelance basis. This can have both advantages and disadvantages (generally, as well as relating to blogging specifically!). On the one hand, I have a certain amount of flexibility to structure my day how I see fit, and therefore potentially include blogging opportunities within that timetable. On the other hand, when you’re at home, you’re surrounded by household jobs that need doing and other distractions, so blogging time very quickly gets eaten into by other things. Work can often be like buses too – wait for ages and then three jobs come along at once. This means that I may have quiet periods when I have time to blog – or post on Twitter/Instagram – and other times when I’m so busy that I forget what a blog is. If you read this blog regularly or follow me on Instagram or Twitter, you may have noticed that this is a pattern I often follow. There’ll be two blog posts in a week and then nothing for a month. I’ll post a photograph on Instagram or a Twitter status every day for a week and then it’ll be sporadic for the next few weeks. However much I try to blog and post regularly, it soon falls by the wayside as work and life get in the way – as I’m sure many working bloggers will identify with! But not all bloggers have another job. For some, blogging is their profession…

I don’t think I was really aware of the concept of being a travel blogger for a job until I became more active on Twitter. I’m not even really sure why I started my blog several years ago – I certainly didn’t expect to make any money from it, let alone turn it into a job. But I like writing and I like holidays – I’m well known among my friends for my holiday obsession – so it seemed like a natural progression to combine the two. And although I obviously hoped to entertain anyone who read my posts (mostly my mum), it was – and is – probably more about satisfying my own writing urges. But through Twitter, Instagram and my tentative foray into the world of WordPress, I’ve become aware that some people blog about travel for their actual job. How cool is that?! They spend the majority – or at least huge chunks – of their lives travelling and the rest writing about it. Their income comes from ads, sponsorship, collaborations and probably lots of other travel-blogging-related avenues. Much (maybe all?) of their travel and accommodation is paid for or subsidised. Their actual profession is Travel Blogger. Then there are other people who perhaps don’t class blogging as their job or their main income but spend their lives travelling nonetheless, as they have a job that they can do remotely. Their laptop travels with them and blogging no doubt supplements their main/other income. As with influencers in many other areas – beauty, fashion, fitness, etc. – many of these travel bloggers have made their blogs pay. They have tens of thousands of followers, their posts and photographs garner hundreds if not thousands of likes and brands want to work with them. And because their whole lives are about travel, they obviously visit lots of new and exciting places – regularly. This means that they have lots to write about and lots of beautiful photographs to post. They blog frequently and update Twitter and Instagram several times a day. Their followers have lots to read and look at, and therefore plenty of reasons to follow, which enables the travel bloggers to keep doing what they love.

In many ways, they are in an enviable position. What’s better than to spend your life going on holiday and getting paid for it? But of course, it’s not that simple. I wrote a Twitter post a couple of days ago that seemed to resonate with quite a few people – I commented that when you work from home or on a freelance basis, you often get comments that imply you don’t earn or have a real job. Because I’m at home all day and can sometimes be flexible about my hours, there’s often a perception that I don’t really do anything or that I should be free to do other things. As a homeworker, you definitely face expectations that people who go ‘out’ to work every day don’t. If you work in an office (or a shop or a construction site or wherever) doing set hours, no one would expect you to make phone calls, do chores or meet up when you’re at work. But because you’re ‘physically’ free as a homeworker, people often forget that you’re not ‘practically’ free – work still has to be done, deadlines still have to be met, sometimes you have no choice over when it gets done and sometimes, when you do, making that phone call, doing that chore or making that meeting just means that you will be working all evening to make up for it. The reason I mention this is that most of those who blog as a career are likely to be in the same position. What they do isn’t classed as a ‘proper job’. They are seen to be living an enviable lifestyle, getting paid to travel and do little else. I suspect that the reality is somewhat different. So-called free time will be spent posting on Twitter and Instagram, engaging with followers, planning and writing blog posts, editing photos and arranging collaborations. To maintain or increase readership and followers, which is surely necessary to be able to blog as a job, posts need to be regular and interesting. Bloggers need to engage with their followers by responding to comments – and the more followers they have, the longer this will take. And as an occasional blogger with a fairly minimal presence on social media, I can only begin to imagine how much time this must take up, and how quickly and easily this could become a full-time job.

Then there’s the ‘holiday’ aspect – and the travel is unlikely to be a holiday by definition for the professional travel blogger. I don’t deny that there must be huge advantages to being able to see lots of new places and experience different things, but I’m sure that the blog must always be in the back of their minds. What do people want to read about? Which places are ‘Instagrammable’? Are they taking in enough information to be able to tell people about it? Have they taken enough photos? They may do things they wouldn’t normally choose to do, or miss out on things they would have liked to do. The trip may be paid for and thus dictated by a sponsor. It’s likely that any ‘spare’ time while away will be spent updating social media or making notes for later blog posts. And those ‘digital nomads’ who work remotely at something non-blog-related while travelling will obviously be doing that job at the same time as trying to fit in travel experiences.

And this is one of the things that puts me off the idea. When I’m on holiday, I want it to be a proper holiday. I want to be enjoying the experiences and fully ‘present’ in the moment, and not planning what I’m going to write about it. I’ve made the mistake of filming a song at a gig and then realising I was so busy making a video I’ll probably never watch again that I didn’t actually appreciate the song – and it’s the same principle! I enjoy taking photographs and I confess to thinking more recently about which ones would be worth posting on Instagram, but I don’t want it to start taking over my holidays. I want to spend my spare time relaxing with a book, not desperately updating my blog. One of the reasons I love holidays, as I’ve mentioned in previous posts, is the ‘escape’ from it all. I want to be away from washing, cleaning, bills, letters from school and – yes – work. I think this is even more the case for me now I work from home. Because I am in the house every day, simply saying to myself that I’m going to take a week off work doesn’t actually make it happen – I end up thinking about all the other things I should be doing and, more than likely, agreeing to a job or two. Only when I am somewhere else can I truly switch off – I can’t do any work if I’m in a tent in France, nor can I tidy the house, wash school uniform or cancel that direct debit. And if that holiday became something I did for work, and that work came with me, when would I truly get the chance to escape for a while?

When I was little, it was my dream to be an author (okay, it still is). As I got older and realised my love for holidays, I thought that writing travel books would be my dream job. More recently, with blogging and social media becoming a ‘thing’, writing a travel blog has potentially become another way to realise the travel writing dream. I would imagine that it holds many similarities to writing travel books or articles for travel magazines (and may well involve doing that too) but is perhaps more ’24-7′, with the constant need to maintain a social media presence. And I’m genuinely not sure whether it’s a life that I would want. I actually enjoy my non-travel-related job. While not a writer, I work as a proofreader and copy-editor, so I’m still in the writing industry. I enjoy my non-working time – okay, so not the washing and cleaning part of it, but I love spending time with my husband, my kids and my friends. I also REALLY enjoy my holidays – and would I enjoy them quite so much if they were part of my job? Would my love for writing disappear if I HAD to do it, and had to do it on a schedule? Would my love for holidays be tainted if they became something I had to do for work? While turning your favourite things into a job sounds ideal in theory, I’m not sure whether the reality would live up to it, and whether it would, in fact, spoil your enjoyment of the things you used to love.

As an occasional blogger, perhaps I have the best of both worlds. I write about something I love as and when I have time and the mood takes me. I go on holiday when I get the chance, and I have a brilliant time. I post on Twitter and Instagram when I get around to it and when I have something to say/share, and I’ve discovered a great, supportive travel community. If I don’t write a blog post for a month, I need to remind myself that it doesn’t matter. Because putting pressure on myself to write to schedule will take all the enjoyment out of it – and that kind of defeats the object! So here’s to full-time bloggers, occasional bloggers and everyone in between – may you continue to blog however it suits you and continue to enjoy it!

(Please note, I’ve made some major assumptions and generalisations about the life of a travel blogger here – please feel free to put me straight if I’m talking rubbish!)

Meet the holiday obsessive

Hello. My name’s Vicki and I’m addicted to holidays.

This is kind of a new blog and kind of an old one. I’ve been languishing over on Blogspot for a few years, but the lack of interaction on that platform, topped with the demise of Google+, has led me over to WordPress. So welcome to any new readers and welcome back to anyone who’s followed me over from my original blog!

Thought I’d carry my old photo over from my old blog – this was taken in the South of France several years ago!

For the new readers, this is not a travel blog, much as I would like it to be. I have two children, I have a job, I have a husband, friends and a social life; this doesn’t leave a whole lot of time for travel, and leaves even less for writing about it. I am not a ‘traveller’ – I’ve not yet been to South America, I’ve never stayed in a youth hostel and I certainly haven’t backpacked my way across the world. What I am is someone who loves holidays, and I go on one every opportunity I get. I like holidays with my family, I like to go away with just my husband and I like holidaying with friends. I like camping, staying in hotels and hiring cottages. I like walking in the Cotswolds, city breaks in Paris, exploring Australia and lying on a beach in Jamaica.

I also like to share my holiday experiences. I might share a review of a hotel I’ve visited. I might share tips. I might share photos. I might share a funny holiday story. I might just prattle on about holidays. If nothing else, I’d say my blog is a bit of an eclectic mix! I don’t blog as often as I’d like to in an ideal world; I may go months without writing and then blog four times in a fortnight – and of course it all depends on whether I’ve been anywhere to write about! I’ve imported all my old posts over from Blogspot, so there’s plenty to read currently, but I’m still finding my way around WordPress and have a lot to learn. But if you’d like to join me on my journey – and assuming I’ve managed to successfully add the ‘follow’ button – then please give me a follow and maybe even add a comment. I’d love to hear from you!

And in the meantime, my next holiday is exactly a month away, so I should have something to write about soon!

Holiday hypotheticals

Those who know me know that I’m a planner. I write a daily to-do list to ensure that everything gets done, I have longer-term lists of everything that needs doing over the next few months and then I plan those things in as much detail as I can. Holidays are no exception. I can be spontaneous (honestly!) – I enjoy just wandering and seeing where we end up, and planning as we go is one of the things I enjoy about camping around France. However, on the whole, my holidays are planned meticulously. I check flight times and prices if it involves a plane; I look for possible stops on the journey if we’re going to be driving. I look at different hotels/campsites/apartments before booking and read reviews to find out more about location, cleanliness, staff, etc. I research all the things there are to do in the area, and often check out places to eat too.

The planning is actually one of the things I like about holidays. If ever I have a momentary panic about the amount I’m spending on one weekend/week/fortnight of my life, I remember that it isn’t just that short amount of time – the impact of a holiday lasts far longer. In addition to the time you spend actually on holiday (still the best bit, obviously), you also get the memories afterwards, plus the lasting wellbeing benefits of having had some time off. Before the holiday, you get the time you spend planning and looking forward to the holiday. If I’m having a bad day, I think about all the exciting things we’ll be doing on holiday. If I’m feeling stressed, I know I’ll be able to forget about my worries for a while when I’m away. If it’s cold, I picture myself lying on the beach in the sun. I enjoy planning what we’ll do and checking out websites for attractions. I like trawling through Twitter, Instagram and travel blogs to find out more information. I check Trip Advisor religiously to read any new reviews for where we’re going. I look at YouTube to see whether there are any videos of our destination, and I even scroll through Google images just for fun. Obsessive, I know (hmmm, wonder where I got my blog title from?!), but it cheers me up.

Of course, as with most things in life, my planning does occasionally have its downsides. The planning has to start before the holiday is actually booked – how else can we decide where to go, where to stay and how to get there? This means that I am initially planning hypothetical holidays… and sometimes I might get just a little bit carried away. Although sometimes I am simply researching flights or hotels for a specific holiday we’re definitely going on, sometimes I have a habit of planning holidays that aren’t definite – or even, on occasion, likely. I’ve done it many times. Sometimes it might be looking in more detail at somewhere that I heard someone mention or saw on TV, for example. Sometimes we might have a bit of extra money (okay, not very often) and I’ll start planning all the exotic places we could go with it. Sometimes my husband or the kids might mention a destination so I’ll look up possible holidays there. Sometimes my planning is relatively sensible – starting to research possible destinations for the summer holidays, for example – and sometimes it’s less so – researching places I’d love to visit and probably never have a hope of actually seeing. I get obsessed with these places (there’s that word again) and bookmark them on Trip Advisor, regularly checking reviews for hotels I’ll probably never visit. I can still tell you the name of the hotel in Cyprus and the one in Mexico* that I was convinced we were going to stay in (but I won’t, because I’ll get sad again).

And it’s that word ‘sad’ that is the downside. Hand in hand with booking any holiday – but particularly a hypothetical one – often goes disappointment. Because that holiday doesn’t always happen. Maybe you haven’t got as much money as you thought you had. Maybe you’re the only one who wants to visit that destination. Maybe the hotel you fancied is fully booked. Maybe the dates don’t fit, the price has gone up or a bad review has changed your mind. Maybe it seemed like the perfect holiday but somehow it’s just not right, or maybe it was a pipe dream that was never going to happen anyway. When your plan for a holiday – or part of a holiday – doesn’t reach fruition, it’s hard not to feel disappointed. If you’re like me, you’ve planned every last detail, looked forward to it and imagined yourself there… and now it’s not happening. And even if you’re able to mitigate that disappointment by booking another holiday – or another element of it – you often find that it just doesn’t match up.

It must be a year ago that we decided to go to Greece this summer, when our youngest expressed an interest in visiting after learning about the Ancient Greeks at school. We talked for a while about where to go – one of the bigger islands like Crete or Rhodes, which we’d already visited but which we knew had lots to do, or one of the smaller islands, which we’d never been to but which might have less to entertain the kids (or us). We opted for Corfu in the end – one of the bigger islands but somewhere we’d only visited once and not seen much of (due to food poisoning – see Corfu – second time lucky?). I started looking at hotels, both through packages and independently, and found one that we all really liked the look of. It was a perfect compromise – big enough to have waterslides and a buffet restaurant but not overly big or ‘British’. The reviews were good and I bookmarked it on Trip Advisor, checking regularly. The trouble was, despite having planned this holiday, we hadn’t actually booked it. We were waiting to have enough money; we were waiting to get my husband’s leave organised; and we just generally hadn’t got around to it. So when we finally went to book the hotel, we were gutted to find that it was already booked up for the dates we could do. It was hard not to be disappointed; we had set our hearts on it and nothing else available ticked all the boxes.

Even more recently, I had the disappointment of the Sardinia holiday that won’t happen. I realised that my husband and I will have been together for 25 years this May – what better excuse for a holiday than a silver anniversary celebration?! I started trawling Travelzoo and Secret Escapes for some exciting cheap deals and found a few possibilities. We found a cheap package to Hong Kong, which we were really tempted by, but we thought that it was maybe a little too extravagant to justify. I started looking at easyJet for prices to various European destinations, and hit upon Sardinia. We could fly there and back for less than £100 each, and hotels seemed to be surprisingly good value. We planned four days over our anniversary, feeling chuffed that it would be both special and affordable. Then my husband went to book the time off work – and it turned out that someone else had already booked that time period and he couldn’t go. Sardinia up in smoke.

Of course, you won’t be surprised to learn that I deal with holiday disappointment in the same way as I deal with anything else that makes me sad – I start planning a holiday. Yes, I know – this is potentially rather counterproductive, but it usually works. In the case of Corfu, having found out that nothing was going to live up to our expectations, we realised that we’d have to change our expectations instead. We decided to forget hotels and look for apartments where we could go self-catering (like all my Greek holidays of years gone by!). We found some nice apartments with a pool and near the beach, with good reviews on Trip Advisor. This time we booked it pretty quickly, to avoid further disappointment, and now I can start planning what to do and where we might like to eat out, given that we won’t have a hotel restaurant (silver lining and all that!). In the case of Sardinia, we realised that no one at my husband’s work had booked off May half-term, so we booked it quickly. We’re now going camping in Dorset with the kids – not exactly the romantic child-free break in the sun that we originally had planned, but I’m now enjoying researching Dorset instead – plus I’m sure we’ll at least fit in an anniversary dinner somewhere.

The moral of today’s blog? Plan away by all means, but don’t invest in it too much if it’s just hypothetical. And if you face disappointment? Planning a holiday always helps…!

* We actually did book that Mexico hotel in the end, for October 2020. No surprises that we didn’t go! It’s rebooked for October this year, so we’ll see…

Swapsies!

A couple of years ago, I wrote about one of the real reasons behind my holiday obsession (What’s really important). Much as I love sun, exploring, doing new things and seeing new places, a major reason for my love of holidays was the quality time I got to spend with my family. Up until a couple of years ago, my husband had been a teacher (as was I, pre-kids). Anyone who has been or known a teacher will understand that the ‘long holidays’ thing is a bit of a myth. My husband spent evenings and weekends working. He spent much of the ‘holiday’ time working. And when he wasn’t working, he was thinking about work. It was only when we went away on holiday and he physically couldn’t work that he would actually start to relax. He would spend the first day or so visibly uncomfortable, clearly thinking about the things he should/could have been doing, and feeling frustrated that he couldn’t do any of them. But after that, once it was clear that he couldn’t do anything about it, he would relax and start to enjoy the holiday, and we would actually get quality time together without the spectre of work hanging over us. Since he gave up teaching, things have been so much better. We get evenings and weekends together. And much as I still love my holidays, they have become less ‘necessary’ in terms of ensuring family time.

My last blog was all about going on too many holidays (Too many holidays? Okay, I concede). At least, that’s what it looks like at first glance. Dig a bit deeper, and you’ll realise that I’m moaning about two things: too many short holidays and too much work. And it’s just started to dawn on me that in many ways I’ve swapped places with my husband.

First things first, let’s make it clear: I haven’t actually got too much work. I only work part-time, and this year was the first time in years that I’ve earned enough to pay tax, so I’m clearly not working ‘too much’. However, because I ‘only’ work part-time, I’m also responsible for the children and for the house, and this means that only a little bit of work can feel like a lot when it’s on top of everything else. You see, as well as the obvious jobs, like the washing, cooking, cleaning, school run and cooking, there are all those niggly little things that also need doing – things like paying bills; making sure that birthday cards and presents are bought, written, wrapped and sent; filling in school forms; making sure that homework is done; and a whole host of other things that don’t sound like much but actually take up a lot of time. I could spend an hour a day doing things that don’t ‘show’ and don’t feel productive but without which things would start to quietly fall apart. For example, in the last couple of days, I’ve filled in a whole bunch of forms for Cubs and Scouts; logged into online banking to pay a credit card bill; organised a costume for my son’s French day at school; remembered to feed my son’s triops (look it up!); and ordered and collected a prescription for the cat’s flea and worm medication – among other things, and on top of work and the usual chores. Ask most working parents and they’ll tell you that it’s staying on top of these ‘little’ things that often pushes them over the edge.

The other reason why work can often feel too much is due to the nature of being self-employed – I work as a freelance copy-editor and proofreader. And while there are many advantages to working from home and being in charge of your own time, there are disadvantages too. Work is like buses – you can go some time without much or any work and then all of a sudden loads comes at once. And the trouble is, because you’ve spent time without work – or you know that you might do again in the future – you don’t feel like you can turn work down when you get it, and so you agree to everything. The trouble is, if you turn down a job, you’re not necessarily losing just that job – the client will have to go elsewhere, and there’s a risk that they may return to that ‘elsewhere’ for their next job too, so you may be turning down future work as well. And because you don’t get paid sick pay or holidays, you feel extra pressure to take on work when you get it. As you can imagine, holidays can be a particular issue, as no one covers for you while you’re away – I often end up working all hours before I go away and as soon as I come back so that I don’t have to turn anything down. The end result is that although sometimes I have very little work, and can comfortably fit in a little ‘me time’ as well as housework and childcare, other times I end up taking on more that I can comfortably manage, and have to work evenings and weekends just to get it completed. And when I’m not working, I’m thinking about work and all the things that I should be doing. Yup, I sound just like my husband.

So why did my last blog post complain about having too many holidays? At the beginning of this post, I said that holidays were the only time when my husband managed to relax, so why isn’t it the same for me? The key is in the word ‘short’. At the beginning of this post, I also mentioned that my husband would spend the first day or two worrying about not being able to work, and it would take him a couple of days before he could relax. And because the majority of my ‘holidays’ this year have been short breaks, I’ve not really had the time to chill out and forget about work. I have spent the first couple of days or so worrying about the work I should be doing and then, just as I should be able to start relaxing, I have had to come home again. Add the extra work needed to accommodate the holiday in the first place, not to mention the usual holiday organisation, and the holidays have actually ended up adding to the stress rather than relieving it. We end up with a vicious circle where I’m working all hours and in desperate need of a holiday, and then said holiday results in me working all hours to make up (and pay) for it. And as my husband takes the kids out at the weekend so that I can get some work done, and as I say no to watching a film together or going out for lunch because I can’t spare the time, I realise: I have become my husband.

For once, there’s no real conclusion to this post. I still stand by everything I said at the end of my last post. I need to practise saying ‘no’ more – no to more work than I can comfortably manage, no to badly timed days/nights out or short breaks, and no to those little mundane things that shouldn’t stress you out but somehow impact so much on your time. I need to switch off from work when I’m not actually working, making use of my auto-reply, not checking my emails and making a concerted effort not to think about work during my spare time. I need to schedule in time to enjoy the simple things like reading, exercising, getting out in nature – even just watching Netflix with my husband and sharing a tub of Ben & Jerry’s. I had already realised the importance of these things, but it’s only since noticing the parallels between my behaviour and my husband’s that I have realised just how important it is to achieve that work-life balance. I don’t want to spend my life living for my two-week summer holiday or my week in October – that’s just wishing life away. I want to live the rest of it, to enjoy my evenings and weekends and my short breaks – hell, to enjoy my work (which I actually kinda do, when I’m not feeling pressured). I don’t know a magic answer, but I’m working on achieving this. It’s hard to change your habits or your mindset, but I’m well aware of the trap that I’m falling into, and I’m determined to drag myself out of it rather than fall in deeper. Things are slowly changing for the better. Despite being super-busy with work the week before, I made sure that I didn’t think about work when I was away for my sister’s wedding recently. I refused to check my email and we made time to catch up with friends, go for a walk and have fun with the kids. I can’t say that I was physically relaxed when we got home (I was shattered!) but I certainly felt better mentally. Work was very busy in the week after I got back, due to an unavoidable deadline, but I made sure that I took time off at the weekend (even though it was tempting not to) to enjoy the sun and spend time with my family. This week, work has calmed down. Instead of using the spare time to do all those other jobs I keep putting off, I have fitted in some exercise, activities with the kids and some good old time in front of the TV. Tomorrow I’m catching up with some friends for brunch, and I won’t feel guilty about it. I have spent enough of my spare time working recently that I shouldn’t feel guilty about enjoying the spare time I have this week. I confess I still really can’t wait until my two weeks in France this August, when it will be impossible to do any work and I really will be able to relax and forget about it. But until then, I am going to enjoy the other things in life: the bigger things, like the two other weddings I have coming up, the night away to celebrate my mum’s birthday and the concert in London with my husband, but also the ‘smaller’ things, like just spending time with those people who matter to me. At the risk of sounding like a cliché, life really is short and we shouldn’t waste it worrying about work. Much as I generally enjoy my job, I work to live rather than the other way around – and if that’s you too, make sure that you get out and live that life you’re working so hard to have!

Taking the time to appreciate the beauty of Corbridge on my recent trip to Northumberland